I admit I am a compulsive escapist. Before circumstance can even think of making me stuck in a situation, I bolt. Well, call it whatever, I hate being stuck - whether it is a situation or a difficult relationship!
I have been bound in 'holy' matrimony thrice. Yeah, you heard it right, thrice! I call it 'holy' not because of the sacred ceremonies we Hindu's 'go through' to be married, but because, for me, the coming together of two souls was sacred. Each time. No doubt!
I have this amazing sixth sense which gives me an indication of a stuck situation to come, long before it actually comes. This happens every time. It happened in all the three marriages I was in. But, like a normal human being, I, many a time, in many other situations, chose not to listen to my sixth sense. And then, again like a normal human being, I regret not having listened to it. Thankfully, this did not happen with my marriages!
Here is a friend's story I need to tell you before we proceed with mine. Married for ten years, having a baby boy and stuck in rut. That is the short of a long story. Stuck because the indications came long before the sticky situation did. Stuck because she chose to ignore those indications. We Indian women are taught in our maiden homes to 'ignore', especially when it comes to shortcomings of our respective spouses. There is a very popular word in Hindi called 'nibhana'. What it essentially means is 'keeping the treaty'. Whether you like it or not, get on with the marriage no matter what!
That she did. And today, she is in a pathetic situation. All because she was keeping the treaty. All because even when she knew, she chose not to know. All because she did not want to look like an escapist!
Back to me. Yep, am an escapist and I have no regrets. We all have but one life. I choose to give it all to a relationship, and I did with all my heart and soul. But if nature gives me indications of things going wrong, of the possibility of me getting stuck in a bad marriage, I chose to take action and get out. Today I am a happy single mother. Today, the world thinks of me as an escapist, but I think of me as somebody who took the right action at the right time.
If that is escapism, so be it!
I have been bound in 'holy' matrimony thrice. Yeah, you heard it right, thrice! I call it 'holy' not because of the sacred ceremonies we Hindu's 'go through' to be married, but because, for me, the coming together of two souls was sacred. Each time. No doubt!
I have this amazing sixth sense which gives me an indication of a stuck situation to come, long before it actually comes. This happens every time. It happened in all the three marriages I was in. But, like a normal human being, I, many a time, in many other situations, chose not to listen to my sixth sense. And then, again like a normal human being, I regret not having listened to it. Thankfully, this did not happen with my marriages!
Here is a friend's story I need to tell you before we proceed with mine. Married for ten years, having a baby boy and stuck in rut. That is the short of a long story. Stuck because the indications came long before the sticky situation did. Stuck because she chose to ignore those indications. We Indian women are taught in our maiden homes to 'ignore', especially when it comes to shortcomings of our respective spouses. There is a very popular word in Hindi called 'nibhana'. What it essentially means is 'keeping the treaty'. Whether you like it or not, get on with the marriage no matter what!
That she did. And today, she is in a pathetic situation. All because she was keeping the treaty. All because even when she knew, she chose not to know. All because she did not want to look like an escapist!
Back to me. Yep, am an escapist and I have no regrets. We all have but one life. I choose to give it all to a relationship, and I did with all my heart and soul. But if nature gives me indications of things going wrong, of the possibility of me getting stuck in a bad marriage, I chose to take action and get out. Today I am a happy single mother. Today, the world thinks of me as an escapist, but I think of me as somebody who took the right action at the right time.
If that is escapism, so be it!
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